My Journal

Dec 10th, 2025 - Wrapping up Autumn Quarter

Ok yeah that was genuinely one of the worst quarters I’ve gone through 😭😭. I submitted my last project on Monday and I danced for 3 minutes, that’s how bad it was. There was just so many projects I was taking lead because otherwise they wouldn’t be completed. Trust me, constantly checking in on your unresponsive group members is a whole ‘nother level of pain. “Hey just wondering if you’ve completed this task?” “Friendly reminder that we have a meeting tomorrow!” “XYZ can you join the zoom call?”. For my major being so competitive, we have quite a few dumbasses running around the department. And yeah I understand you’re busy, but so am I bruh. We attend a prestigious university that’s known for competitive students, obviously we’re all in 15 organizations and 2 internships.

For one of my group projects my team members contributed NOTHING to the final document, and she had the audacity to text the group chat asking why she got a zero on it. I’m rewiring my brain from “people-pleaser” to “petty-bitch”, so I said “I don’t know, email the teacher.” And the teacher knows that she’s been slacking this quarter so the blame won’t lie on me.

Speaking of which, I presented for that class and I did amazing. This is coming from the same girl who would get awful panic attacks during presentations and refused to talk to employees. Normally standing in front of 50 students would’ve sent me spiraling, but I was able to look at them with no fear. I just had to remind myself that they’re college students who don’t give a shit. I stumbled a bit here and there, but I was very well spoken even though I created the presentation the night before and ran through it once.

Outside of that I also was teaching little kids at a nearby school. Holy moly working with children is such a character builder, teachers really are god’s bravest soldiers. One class I taught was with a few 8-year olds and they were super chill. For the most part they knew how to use Canva and mostly needed help with spelling. My favorite memory was just us going through a list of Harry Potter jelly bean flavors and being grossed out. During the last class one of my students hugged me and begged me not to go which was so sweet 😭.

The other class was a nightmare though. Fifteen kindergarten students working with MS paint, I was running like a chicken without a head. Since they’re so young they don’t retain what I teach them, so if I don’t help them they get frustrated and start crying. Also I had to work with my boss during that class and she sucks balls. I’m the “teaching assistant” but I ended up doing most of the work load, such as opening all the laptops and saving files. EXTREMELY TIME CONSUMING btw and I had max 10 minutes to do so. If I missed anything then she’d get mad, but like bruh you’re the owner of this organization why did you expect a 19 year old to take all the responsibility. Anyways next quarter I’m working alone with a small group which is great because I don’t have to deal with my boss. I also realized more people do this job for the “technical” experience such as CS, but I just like working with children. Like who else will ask me to guess their second favorite color.

But other than my academics and jobs, my social game is strong. There were a solid 6 weeks where I was just partying every weekend lmao. To be fair it is festive season with Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Diwali. I started dropping off towards the end though, my friends and I were knee deep in academics. My favorite party was Friendsgiving, which I hosted at my apartment! It was my first time hosting as well, so it was really exciting to see it all come together after weeks of planning. The good thing about college is how I can just go wherever I want whenever without freaking out my parents lol.

Overall this quarter had some high and very low moments in my life, but I suppose we gotta keep riding the waves. As always I'm grateful for my friends, family, my various mental health apps, and I for keeping me sane. 💖